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Reflections from the past - Florentina Barbu
![Reflections from the past - Florentina Barbu [1]](https://gomagcdn.ro/domains/editurauniversitara.ro/files/product/original/reflexii-din-trecut-548348.jpg "Reflections from the past - Florentina Barbu [1]")
Publisher: Editura Universitara
Author: Florentina Barbu
Edition: I
Pages: 228
Publisher year: 2023
ISBN: 978-606-28-1624-7
DOI: 10.5682/9786062816247
Product Code:
9786062816247
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I woke up in the afternoon, late, with a big headache. Everything revolved around me. After Emir left, I drank a lot, to numb my senses. I felt empty, meaningless, without him. I was finally feeling something different for the first time in my life.
I felt a hand caressing me, it was Alex. I jumped like I was on fire. I didn't want him to touch me, I felt that I was betraying Emir. I didn't want to belong to another man. I got up from the bed, gently pushing the hand that was trying to grasp me. I felt her cold like a snake crawling on me. Without a word, I left the bedroom, instinctively stopping in the hallway in front of the mirror. I looked directly into my eyes. A pain so sharp engulfed me, that it was as if the mirror had broken and I was walking on its shards. My image dissipated in it while a huge emptiness encompassed me and hugged me, suffocating me. I felt that I had to leave the house, free myself and cool my mind. Everything around me was spinning, I felt like I was on quicksand.
I knew what I had done and that starting with that moment I had lost all my life that I had known until then.
I couldn't look Alex in the eye anymore, I felt like I hated him, but actually I hated myself.
***
Emir, Carina, Alex, to which other fluctuating characters can be added, temporarily form a couple or a trio, which comes together and dissolves, not according to the unwritten rule of dreaming, but according to the rule of domestic "chaos", at the request and to the desire of each of the partners. Life in three is a panda and an archive of the smallest gestures of the other partners. The chasm, the title of a chapter, deepens throughout the book. Emotion, the feeling as a binder, only works epidermally, on the surface. Everyone's hidden mirror says something different. Hence an "emotional unavailability", an anti-connection between the passenger partners.
Florentina Barbu's book tries to find the mirage, the miraculous possibility of giving flying wings to a petrified butterfly.
Clelia Ifrim
I felt a hand caressing me, it was Alex. I jumped like I was on fire. I didn't want him to touch me, I felt that I was betraying Emir. I didn't want to belong to another man. I got up from the bed, gently pushing the hand that was trying to grasp me. I felt her cold like a snake crawling on me. Without a word, I left the bedroom, instinctively stopping in the hallway in front of the mirror. I looked directly into my eyes. A pain so sharp engulfed me, that it was as if the mirror had broken and I was walking on its shards. My image dissipated in it while a huge emptiness encompassed me and hugged me, suffocating me. I felt that I had to leave the house, free myself and cool my mind. Everything around me was spinning, I felt like I was on quicksand.
I knew what I had done and that starting with that moment I had lost all my life that I had known until then.
I couldn't look Alex in the eye anymore, I felt like I hated him, but actually I hated myself.
***
Emir, Carina, Alex, to which other fluctuating characters can be added, temporarily form a couple or a trio, which comes together and dissolves, not according to the unwritten rule of dreaming, but according to the rule of domestic "chaos", at the request and to the desire of each of the partners. Life in three is a panda and an archive of the smallest gestures of the other partners. The chasm, the title of a chapter, deepens throughout the book. Emotion, the feeling as a binder, only works epidermally, on the surface. Everyone's hidden mirror says something different. Hence an "emotional unavailability", an anti-connection between the passenger partners.
Florentina Barbu's book tries to find the mirage, the miraculous possibility of giving flying wings to a petrified butterfly.
Clelia Ifrim
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Reflections from the past - Florentina Barbu
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FLORENTINA BARBU
1. Mirror of the soul / 7
2. Delirium / 11
3. Support / 16
4. The dream / 22
5. The chasm / 26
6. The reunion / 33
7. The Little Prince / 38
8. The first touch / 43
9. Emotion and vibration / 50
10. The first lie / 54
11. Detachment from the past / 62
12. Betrayal / 67
13. The reality / 74
14. Alex / 78
15. Butterflies in the stomach / 83
16. Wounds / 87
17. Radu / 96
18. Chaos / 103
19. Dance for two / 106
20. Fragility / 110
21. The newcomer / 114
22. A new beginning / 120
23. Pain / 124
24. Loss / 126
25. Blandete / 133
26. The collapse / 137
27. A return to the past / 144
28. The help / 149
29. Paradise / 154
30. Torture in two / 159
31. A new disappointment / 174
32. Flirting / 182
33. There is no fear in love / 190
34. Meeting with the future / 194
35. A new life / 207
36. Cry for help / 211
37. Healing / 219
38. The retrieval / 224
2. Delirium / 11
3. Support / 16
4. The dream / 22
5. The chasm / 26
6. The reunion / 33
7. The Little Prince / 38
8. The first touch / 43
9. Emotion and vibration / 50
10. The first lie / 54
11. Detachment from the past / 62
12. Betrayal / 67
13. The reality / 74
14. Alex / 78
15. Butterflies in the stomach / 83
16. Wounds / 87
17. Radu / 96
18. Chaos / 103
19. Dance for two / 106
20. Fragility / 110
21. The newcomer / 114
22. A new beginning / 120
23. Pain / 124
24. Loss / 126
25. Blandete / 133
26. The collapse / 137
27. A return to the past / 144
28. The help / 149
29. Paradise / 154
30. Torture in two / 159
31. A new disappointment / 174
32. Flirting / 182
33. There is no fear in love / 190
34. Meeting with the future / 194
35. A new life / 207
36. Cry for help / 211
37. Healing / 219
38. The retrieval / 224
Do we really love?
How can we truly love a man if we ourselves make our soul kneel down in an attempt to change him?
We create a scenario in which we love the person next to us, but, in fact, we love what we think that person represents.
Do you really love when you try to change a man, when you try to hold him by force when he wants to leave?
The truth is that we have to let it go to be what it is.
We need to let it go in order to free ourselves from suffering, but it is much easier to carry around a story that our imagination has created, than to we open our eyes wide and see what is actually in front of us.
How can we truly love a man if we ourselves make our soul kneel down in an attempt to change him?
We create a scenario in which we love the person next to us, but, in fact, we love what we think that person represents.
Do you really love when you try to change a man, when you try to hold him by force when he wants to leave?
The truth is that we have to let it go to be what it is.
We need to let it go in order to free ourselves from suffering, but it is much easier to carry around a story that our imagination has created, than to we open our eyes wide and see what is actually in front of us.
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